Growing my Faith: Immature and Incomplete

What is it to be a Christian?

I have been a Christian since I was 8 in 1999 and walked down my Southern Baptist church aisle and was baptized as a believer. Since then I did all the things you should, or so I thought. I went to church. I prayed from time to time. I tried to be good and didn’t get drunk or do drugs or sleep around. I thought I was a pretty great Christian, until 2025. Fast forward 26 years and I am the same Christian I was in 1999. I am nowhere near the same person. Understandably, I grew, became an adult, then a wife and mother, and stayed the same Christian just trying to make good choices.

Then, January 9, 2025 I felt lead to pick up my bible. I thought, maybe I’ll start reading through some stuff so that I know what I’m actually supposed to be doing as a mom. As I mentioned earlier, I was a different person now. I am 33 years-old. I am a wife with my 5th anniversary coming up this week. When I married Mathew, I became a mom to 2 boys who are now 15 and 13 years old. In 2021, I became a mom to a beautiful little girl who is now 3. This all sounds great and it is, but that doesn’t mean it tests me to no end some days. Teenage boys are hard. Toddler girls are hard. Being married is hard. I needed help and I knew it. My anxiety and depression had reached an all-time high and I felt like I’d been in fight or flight mode for 5 years. So, I pick up the book that is supposed to have all the answers.

I remember one of my college roommates urging me to read the book of James. My daughter’s middle name is James after my husband’s grandfather. So I thought, yeah, I could start there.

James 1:4 says “But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.” My bible, a study bible went on to slap my in the face with the most true fact that I have heard in awhile. “Immaturity and incompletion are not acceptable long-term states for the Christian disciple.” Whoops. Here I sit, the same state of maturity and completion as I was at 8 years old. No true growth to show in 25 years. James was speaking to me.

That’s where this journey starts. I want to know what it means to be a mature Christian. I want to know what it means to be complete in Christ. I want to know what it means to be a Godly wife, mother, and woman. I am starting this to find out who I was truly created to be because surely it isn’t a stagnant Christian.

Whether you are just finding Christ, curious about Him, or a long time Christian, I look forward to you joining me on this journey if only so we know we aren’t alone. We can grow together and help one another. No one should do life alone or think that they have to hide themselves while bettering themself.